Friendships & Frustrations

It's been a long while since I've posted a blog. I apologize to my dear, dear, dear reads. Life has been super busy and other things have taken priority. Tonight I was just feeling a little down and I needed a way to vent my frustrations so here it is. I'm sorry if this sounds like a pity party but this is just how I am feeling so if you don't want to read about it please don't continue.

Sometimes it's easier for me to just type my frustrations here where I don't have to listen to others input at the time I am feeling it. I'm sorry if you feel I'm unloading on you but I guess everybody needs to do that sometimes. Oh well.

For a while now I feel like I'm kind of stuck in a rut. I go to work and I come home. Yeah I do lots of different things on the weekends and I stay busy but I just don't feel like I'm developing relationships that will last me through the rest of my life. I guess what it gets down to is boys. Stupid boys. -sigh- I just feel like whenever I start getting to know somebody knew they always play the "we're friends only" card. And I'm okay with that most of the time. But there just comes a point when it's too hard to handle anymore.

When I was a little bit younger, I thought I'd be married by the time I was 21. But I'm not and there aren't any prospects of it happening anytime soon. Don't get me wrong, I'm fine with being single but I'd like to at least be thought of like girl and not just "my friend" by the guys that I know.

Lately, I've been trying to be a better person because I tend to be a little mean and sarcastic where boys are concerned. I even had a friend ask my roommate if I even liked him as a person at all. When I found that out I was a little crushed. I think I'm little bit too much like my dad. I need to learn to keep my mouth shut sometimes or most times as the case maybe. I also tend to be a little sensitive when people say things to me sometimes and I'm trying so hard to work on that. But it's a work in progress.

I don't want anyone to feel sorry for me I just needed to vent for a minute. Sometimes a girl just feels like crying and that's how I'm feeling right now. But I don't want to. I don't like crying in front of people because they ask what's wrong and I don't want to explain that nothing is really wrong. Just that I'm feeling down.

Thanks for reading. I'm sorry if this was a downer on your day. I really do apologize. I just needed to get these thoughts out of my head. Much love to all my faithful readers and friends. Love ya!