Ponderings

My last post was kind of a vent post. I'm doing fine and I have had several conversations with several people that have made me realize my life isn't as bad as I sometimes think it is. I have so many blessings and so many things to be grateful for.

First of all, I am so grateful for having family close by that can help me out if they are able. Second, I am so glad that I have been doing well enough in school to get a scholarship. A few months back I was worried about being able to pay for school this year and then I found out that I was awarded a scholarship so I don't have to worry about that one.

I can't even begin to list the numerous things that have gone my way lately. There have been hard things too but I realized that is how the Lord tries us: by giving us hard things and seeing how we respond to them. Timing is the key to everything. A lot of the time we want everything to work out in our time, according to our plans. But that is not how our Heavenly Father works. He will send us different things in our lives when he knows it is best for us. We have to trust in his time and know that everything will work out for the best. Life would be so much easier if we were just given a schedule or calendar of when every thing was going to happen in our lives wouldn't it? But I guess that's why there's that trial of faith that is talked about in Ether 12:6.

Anyways, I just wanted to say that life is pretty good right now. This summer went by so fast for me. I've just finished up my internship and about 3 weeks ago I started training for my job that I'm going to have in the fall. So I've been pretty busy. I'm excited for my little vacation that I'm taking to California to visit my family. I am way excited but will miss all my friends in Provo. You guys rock!!

Friendships & Frustrations

It's been a long while since I've posted a blog. I apologize to my dear, dear, dear reads. Life has been super busy and other things have taken priority. Tonight I was just feeling a little down and I needed a way to vent my frustrations so here it is. I'm sorry if this sounds like a pity party but this is just how I am feeling so if you don't want to read about it please don't continue.

Sometimes it's easier for me to just type my frustrations here where I don't have to listen to others input at the time I am feeling it. I'm sorry if you feel I'm unloading on you but I guess everybody needs to do that sometimes. Oh well.

For a while now I feel like I'm kind of stuck in a rut. I go to work and I come home. Yeah I do lots of different things on the weekends and I stay busy but I just don't feel like I'm developing relationships that will last me through the rest of my life. I guess what it gets down to is boys. Stupid boys. -sigh- I just feel like whenever I start getting to know somebody knew they always play the "we're friends only" card. And I'm okay with that most of the time. But there just comes a point when it's too hard to handle anymore.

When I was a little bit younger, I thought I'd be married by the time I was 21. But I'm not and there aren't any prospects of it happening anytime soon. Don't get me wrong, I'm fine with being single but I'd like to at least be thought of like girl and not just "my friend" by the guys that I know.

Lately, I've been trying to be a better person because I tend to be a little mean and sarcastic where boys are concerned. I even had a friend ask my roommate if I even liked him as a person at all. When I found that out I was a little crushed. I think I'm little bit too much like my dad. I need to learn to keep my mouth shut sometimes or most times as the case maybe. I also tend to be a little sensitive when people say things to me sometimes and I'm trying so hard to work on that. But it's a work in progress.

I don't want anyone to feel sorry for me I just needed to vent for a minute. Sometimes a girl just feels like crying and that's how I'm feeling right now. But I don't want to. I don't like crying in front of people because they ask what's wrong and I don't want to explain that nothing is really wrong. Just that I'm feeling down.

Thanks for reading. I'm sorry if this was a downer on your day. I really do apologize. I just needed to get these thoughts out of my head. Much love to all my faithful readers and friends. Love ya!

Happiness in a Classy Black Number

Ladies and gents I am not talking about some nice black article of clothing but about my new (well new to me) car! She is so pretty and very classy looking. I recently purchased (by purchased I mean my parents purchased) a 2004 black Hyundai Sonata. The inside is so pretty! It's tan leather interior . It has a sun roof and a CD player. Everything is automatic: transmission, windows, mirrors, doors, seats, everything! It is so awesome and I am so excited for the freedom that my own car will provide. It's a little scary because the car is actually mine. It's in my name and everything. Every time I drive it I'm afraid something bad is going to happen and I will total my car and then I will have flushed lots of money down the drain. Hopefully I will get over this fear soon. Utah drivers just make me extremely nervous...

On a lighter note I just want to mention my new favorite song by Taylor Swift. It's called White Horse. I've included it here for your convenience so you should check it out. It's kind of a sad song but I love it a lot. One reason I love it so much is that I danced last night to this song with one amazing guy who we will call Beautiful so as not to mention any names. He's probably the coolest guy I've ever met. It made me so happy to dance with him. Ok now I'm done with my girly moment but just thought I'd let you know what's up.



P.S. Pictures of my car will be coming shortly. I just haven't had time to take any/post them. Much love!

Excitement!!

This weekend I was talking to my dad and we were just joking around because that's how my dad is and then he said "I'm going to be serious now so you need to listen to what I'm going to say." I thought he was joking but he had something serious to tell me. My dad informed me that he and my mom are going to buy me a car!! I am so excited but a little worried at the same time. I'm excited because this is gonna be awesome! I've never had a car at school before. I'm scared because I have to find it and do everything to get it but I don't know the first thing about buying a car. I need to find someone who can help me decide and go with me to look at cars and check out the engine and everything. It's so hard and frustrating and difficult I just don't know where to begin searching. If anyone has an advice, I will willingly listen to what ever you have to say. This probably doesn't convey how excited I am but I am totally stoked!

I'm Lovin' It!

This is probably going to a repeat to some people that I have talked to but I absolutely positively love my job! I haven't been able to say that in a long time. But it's the best job ever. I get to learn new skills that will help me in my academic career and I get to work as an actual researcher. It is so awesome and I love meeting all the interesting individuals that I am interviewing.

Yesterday before my staff meeting I ran into Alex Jensen who just graduated from my major in April and he used to be the president of the SFLSA and he asked me how interviewing was going and I told him it was awesome and I love my job. He thinks I should be a spokesperson for Flourishing Families Project to get people to do interviewing because I love it so much and I am always excited for it. I totally would too. This is one of the best learning experiences I have ever had and I am so grateful that I was accepted into the position. I am learning so many things that I can use just as well outside of my job. I love it!

First Interview

So today I gave my first interview for my internship as a researcher for the Flourishing Families Project at BYU. Last night I was really worried about it because it came up last minute and I didn't have a lot of time to prepare for it But when I woke up this morning I wasn't nervous or anxious about it at all. It was so good and the family was so nice and I had such a good time and I don't think I forgot anything too major. I think I'm going to have a great time doing this this summer. Yay me!

Settling in

The last 5 or so days have been quite hectic. This last weekend I moved from apartment 25 to apartment 26 so my new room looked like a bomb went off but now everything is in it's proper place. I'm excited to be in my new place. It's not that far from the old one but it will be lots of fun this summer. For some reason it's a lot easier for me to ask my new roomies to take me places then the old ones. Weird...

Today was the official start of my internship. I just helped semi-organize the office and we had a little orientation. I think tomorrow I will start trying to contact families and make appointments for interviews. It will be exciting but scary when I acutally do an interview. I'll let you know how it goes when it comes around.

Tomorrow (Wednesday) I'm going to start training for my second job doing data entry for one of my professors. Hopefully I'll be able to keep that job into the fall...we'll have to see what Dr. Walker says. Keep your fingers crossed for me though :)

I really like my life right now. Sure work is a little hard and stressful. But I like it and I really heart my roommates and I'm excited for this summer and all the things I'm going to learn. I think I'm going to experiment with some new recipes and bake some new things. I already tried something new on Sunday and it was really yummy. It was called Edith's Viva Chicken. It came out of the recipe book my mom got me from my home ward. It was so yummy! And the leftovers were/are great as well. If anyone wants to try it just let me know